An Inspirational Weekend at the 5th Annual Bikram Yoga Women's Retreat

[I have included quotes from memory of Emmy Cleaves and Rajashree Chaudhury throughout this entry.]

Your time is now.

Recently, I had the wonderful opportunity to attend the 5^th annual Women’s Retreat in Texas with around 200 other women. It was an amazing event for a number of reasons, but the teachers truly made the weekend stand out.

Keep happy memories alive, let go of sad ones.

Emmy Cleaves is a Holocaust survivor in her mid-80s. I had read about the tragedies in her early life and was interested in her story and relationship to yoga. But during the course of the retreat, she never once uttered the world “Holocaust” or made reference to those events. She only made a single, passing remark about “tension headaches,” and the relief she got from Bikram yoga.

As you might expect, Emmy prides herself on being tough. When you learn of her story, Emmy’s dictum—“life is hard, get over it”—takes on a profound significance. She is old school, direct, and teaches you to practice yoga and life with as few crutches as possible. In other words, take ownership and responsibility.

Don’t feel guilty. You deserve to be happy.

Emmy’s fellow teacher, Rajashree Chaudhury,  is the co-creator of the Bikram Yoga Teacher Training program. She is younger than Emmy but carries the wisdom of many lives. Her story is one of adaptation. She was married by arrangement and then had to integrate her old-world customs into her newfound California lifestyle.

You can feel Rajashree’s warmth as she teaches and lectures. She talks about the love she feels for her children, as well as the joys and challenges of being a businesswoman.

Sometimes you need to inspire yourself.

Discern the difference between pain and challenges.

The intermingling of these two different perspectives was fascinating. Some of Raja and Emmy’s core principles were the same. For example, they both preached the importance of working diligently towards your own happiness. But on the means to arriving at that end, they diverged.

Emmy’s past informed her realist perspective on life. Every day, every decision, and every pose is a challenge and you must stay focused through it all. Yoga is a key element to that constant vigilance.

Thanks to her much deserved success, Rajashree is much more of an optimist. Us women drew inspiration from her positive attitude and hopeful words. For her, yoga keeps one balanced mentally and physically and on the right track.

Yoga without mindfulness is just calisthenics.

Much of the insight they imparted would apply to any practice. But in this context, considering their life stories, the women’s retreat reinforced my choice to move towards my own happiness. These two women have experienced a great deal in their life. You can tell this just by listening to their wisdom and witnessing their health, personalities, and attitudes. Yoga has made them very solid in their belief that a physically and mentally challenging daily practice prepares you for the very real demands of life. 

Student of the Month

I was recently named Bikram Student of the Month by the Detroit Bikram studio! Here's the story:

At Detroit Bikram, we are always amazed at the wide variety of students who come to practice at our studios. Our students come from all walks of life. They range from different age groups (early teens to way into their 80's believe it or not), to a wide variety of professions. From doctors, teachers, nurses, stay at home moms/dads, lawyers, architects, waitresses, retirees, college students, professional athletes, and even yoga instructors who teach other styles of Hatha Yoga. That brings us to our next Student of the Month: Gail Mondry.

Read the rest of the story here.

A Lesson from a Master Teacher

Amidst all of the stories being released around the 10^th anniversary of 9/11, I was reminded of my own experience soon after that tragic day. This is not meant to be a commentary about the event—there have been plenty of those already. Instead, I wanted to relate a relevant story, which highlights the benefit yoga has in traumatic times.

Thirty days after 9/11 my husband and I flew to New York for an international meeting of a scientific institute we support. Naturally I was nervous to fly. But I took comfort in my yoga mat, which I slung over my shoulder and felt securely against my back. Arriving at LaGuardia with heightened security was quite startling. There were police and dogs and more than once I was asked to open my yoga bag.

The meeting was at the mostly empty Waldorf Astoria. Soon after unpacking, I researched potential workshops and found one in the Village called “How to Improve the Quality of Your Practice,” taught by Mark Whitwell. I had never had the opportunity to practice with Mark, but had certainly heard about him. I signed up online and got up early the next morning to go downtown.

When I exited the subway in the Village, I was immediately overcome by the astringent smell in the air and the presence of silt everywhere. On the mailboxes, benches, windowsills, street signs, there was a film of the debris, which I knew had been the remains of the planes and buildings. It is one thing to see images of the aftermath on television. It is quite another to experience the devastation. The fact that so much rubble remained thirty days after was extremely startling.

I arrived at the studio to find close to a hundred teachers in a very agitated state. I heard a louder than normal buzz in the room from nervous chatter and students grabbing woodblocks and straps and bolsters and trying to find a place for their mat. I wasn’t used to practicing with props but I grabbed a couple anyway, feeling agitated myself.

In strode the striking presence of Mark Whitwell. Without much explanation, he encouraged us to let go of the props and start breathing. He seemed oppressed by his inherited responsibility as a master teacher to help all of us deal with the situation at hand.

But his practice was precisely what every teacher in that room needed.

This workshop forever changed how I will view a yoga practice. It wasn’t about postures, or sequencing, or props, or alignment. It was very simple asanas, coming to our breath, child’s pose. There wasn’t any music or adjustments. There was crying, moving toward healing, and repetition of simple postures. And a lot of sitting.

Mark revealed to me the true purpose of yoga: connecting the mind to the breath, linking breath to movement in order to still the fluctuations of the mind.

Processing trauma is very difficult. It takes a focused mind to move out of a harmful situation into the promise of a calmer self. What I participated in that day was something to which I and the other hundred teachers could immediately relate.

But, what about the hundreds of people I passed on the street and in the metro on my way to the studio? They walked briskly, heads down, as if trying to bore their way to their destination. They were still paranoid and stressed, like I had felt when navigating through the airport the previous day.

Mark Whitwell’s workshop reminded me of the skill set that a steady yoga practice provides. It is grounding. It prepares you for battles that you can’t anticipate in your life. But when they arrive, you are much more fit to face them. 

What Does 'Vacation' Mean to You?

In the interests of full disclosure, I run a business called Yoga Vacations. This post is meant to explain the differences between two valid kinds of yoga which incorporate travel.

The yoga retreat has been around for a long time. If you generalize to include spiritual expeditions like pilgrimages (“retreating” from society), then perhaps millennia. Today’s retreats are all based on the group experience. A teacher takes a small number of students, usually into the wilderness, with the intention of becoming more spiritual, cleansed, and connected. Activities are done communally, whether it’s the practice itself, meditation, diet, or daily rituals. Many have dorm-like housing. Everyone shares in the challenges. Except for a few breaks for rest and recovery, you’re with the same people all the time.

When yoga first got a foothold in the States, the retreat was a kind of fringe service for people who wanted to detoxify and have a spiritual experience. It was, and still is, a more demanding method and a little radical. As yoga became mainstream, the retreat didn’t change much except in variety. Nowadays, it covers a wider range of people, places, and practices.

Over the last 12 plus years that I’ve been teaching yoga, I’ve observed that vacationers would travel to wonderful locations but felt they lacked the accompaniment of a great yoga practice. At the same time, they didn’t want the rigor of a retreat. I sensed a need for something with fewer guidelines, and a service which allowed for ample personal time. I certainly wasn’t the only one to notice this. But out of this need, the yoga vacation arose.

A yoga vacation is an all-encompassing sensory experience. The student gets plenty of time on the yoga mat, but can also eat great food, explore the city, go hiking or do other outdoor activities. The daily yoga practice grounds the vacationer so they can be more open to the adventures and cultural experiences on their trip.

People on a yoga vacation use the practice to open up their senses and absorb everything around them. It’s not an excuse to pig out or go on a bender, but rather a way to be a more tranquil self and gain all you can minus the distractions of a job or kids. Ultimately, you’re still on vacation, and enjoyment is a definite priority.

I would like to relate a personal story that highlights what yoga does for me on a vacation.

I was recently in New York City. When I go there, I love to attend a morning class. While I do have a daily practice, I try to seek out a teacher or style that isn't accessible back home. Then I go to the museum followed by the theater. Yoga puts me in the right mindset for these expansive activities. I'm more present and can sit for a long time with an open mind. I better absorb the latent artistic and cultural waves around me. 

Though I run a business that uses the yoga vacation model, I love going on retreats as well. It’s just a different experience. Students might choose one or the other depending on the time of year, who they want to travel with, what style of yoga they practice, what other cultural activities they want to participate in, just to name a few. While there’s nothing wrong with the more spartan retreat, there’s also a lot to be said for sleeping in a comfortable bed and eating fabulous cuisine.

(Warning: promotional material to follow)

Here’s an upcoming example of the vacation approach. Yoga Vacations has planned a wonderful trip in Telluride starting September 29th: Jivamukti Yoga with Dechen Thurman. We will do a vigorous Asana practice every day, then go hiking in the mountains or to the spa. In the evening we will come together for a more focused workshop. At that point in the season, the town will be serene and the fall colors should have arrived. The group harmony of a chant, in this stunning setting, is truly a work of art.

The student should be able to achieve great peace of mind in this setting. There will also be plenty of schedule flexibility, so the student can pursue their personal interests as well. It should be a lot of fun and maybe you’ll consider joining us.

Here's a welcoming invitation from Dechen himself:

Lions on the Mat

These people need Yoga

On any given day at Bikram Yoga Detroit, there is probably a professional athlete in the room. They tend to stand out.

Recently, two football players—not sure if they were Lions or Wolverines, but I heard they were high-level players—came to a class I attended. They arrived together, put their mats down, and chatted in a way which suggested they weren’t accustomed to a yoga class. If I had to guess, they were probably thinking something like: Really, how hard can this be? There’s a bunch of housewives in here, a pregnant woman, some overweight people, elderly people, and a few hardbodies.

Meanwhile, I knew what was in store for them. Despite the teacher’s instruction to focus on our own practice, it was hard not to observe them on occasion, especially when they would speak softly and laugh with each other. 

The teacher walked in and said, “Good morning. Please step to the front of your mat.” The footballers could do that. The first couple of postures weren’t a big deal either, although one of them had trouble locking his arms close to his head. Not surprisingly, his big muscles got in the way. Then we moved into more difficult standing and stretching work. Everyone in the room became more challenged, as is the norm in a Bikram class.

These two young, professional athletes had no endurance issues. The extreme heat didn’t seem to bother them and I don’t remember them drinking much water. The challenges lay elsewhere. They found their edge quickly. Even though these super-athletes must have found it startling to be unable to tackle (pun intended) many postures or keep up with their less-fit peers, they maintained their focus and sense of humor. 

If they couldn't complete a posture or hold it for 90 seconds, they would laugh, then try again. I was pleased that the teacher didn't call them out for communicating with each other, which is typically taboo in the yoga room. Reason being, the lessons they learned and the attitude with which they practiced, are lessons for all of us.

As a student, I often fall into the trap of getting discouraged when I can’t fully express the pose. Since I’ve been a Bikram practitioner for over two years, I have a full understanding of the sequence of movements. Yet I still find myself judging my practice in a way that’s not constructive. It was so refreshing to see these two extremely fit men attempt these difficult postures and stay positive amidst the effort. They maintained great respect for the detailed instruction and didn’t let their egos get in the way.

And their mindset influenced everyone’s that day. We fed off their positive energy, and they in turn looked to us for direction. I would even go so far as to say that we regulars felt pretty good about ourselves. Yoga is a great equalizer, as it can be practiced with the same vigor, concentration, and benefit for housewives and professional athletes alike. In the most general sense, we all showed up, practiced, did the best we could, and left victorious.

This is what I love most about group practice. Everyone comes to the table (or mat) with their own genes, and physical history of injury and recovery. In the end, we are able to move forward collectively in our health.

This particular practice was a great reminder about attitude in class. Even for an experienced practitioner, the best yoga is tough. The practice changes daily depending on how your treated your body in the last 24 hours. One way to deal with the obstacles you face every time is by being a little self-deprecating. A mixture of humor and focus allow you to recover from a botched attempt and prevent spiraling into negativity. Trouble comes if you get discouraged or competitive. These are needless detriments to a healthy practice and drain you of energy. This is true of any practice, sport or otherwise, and is one of the valuable lessons you want to utilize off the mat. 

My First Class All Over Again

Two and a half years ago, my orthopedic doctor told me I couldn’t do any practice for six months where I have to put weight on my head or hands. This is because my body had taken some abuse over the years. I managed to tear my upper back from teaching and practicing inversions in Vinyasa classes, and my SI join was permanently misaligned since a doctor popped it with forceps delivering my second child. Apparently, he just stitched me up without mentioning that my tailbone had dislodged. Fast forward 20 years. Compounded by two decades of a cardio junkie lifestyle, I was left with problems in my feet, knees, and hips. Basically, I was a mess.

Then I discovered a way to satisfy my body’s need for healing: Bikram Yoga. My first Bikram class was a rude awakening to all the challenges I had created in my body through my own ignorance. Granted, there were no handstands or planks, but at this point I couldn't even bear weight on my right hand to turn around and lay down for sivasana. My tendinitis was so severe that I always felt a sharp pain behind my elbow when pulling my feet back for upward bow.

I did not love the humbling experience of my first Bikram yoga class. But I was relieved that I could do something that let me feel my body. So I went back by default. I can't remember the exact time when I started enjoying the practice, but I did. In fact, I started to love it. Two years later, I can honestly say my spine is healed and my tendinitis is gone. I'm a believer. So much so, that I wanted to meet Bikram and do business with him.

This week, I got that chance. I was invited to meet with Bikram at his International Headquarters in California. When I walked into his offices, he was just finishing class with Emmy Cleaves, a senior teacher and Holocaust survivor. I was immediately drawn to Bikram's sincerity. It's not every day that you meet a teacher of his stature who practices with his students. He quickly cleaned up and led me upstairs to his private office. I started the meeting by telling him that this was the first plane trip in 20 years where my back didn't hurt walking off the plane and I had him to thank. He told me stories of people that had come to him in far worse shape than I. He had helped them all. At the end of the meeting where we discussed potential yoga vacations in faraway places, he insisted that I join him at his 5 p.m. class with his teachers in training. Maybe this was his way of checking my sincerity.

I walked into the hotel lobby and could feel the heat emanating from the 2nd floor ballroom. My nervousness heightened after I saw hundreds of flip-flops and t-shirts spread about the entrance. In the ballroom stood what looked like several 747 engines pumping heat. What a bizarre sight! 500 yoga bodies, mirrors everywhere, an elevated couch (throne?) in the front of the room, and yet it was still ornamented with the chandeliers and molding of a typical ballroom.

Even after acclimating to the odd scenery, I still struggled with the intensity of the practice and heat. Forget seeing yourself in a mirror, I was in the back row with the senior teachers and the heaters right behind me. Some said the room was hovering at 120 degrees! My water didn’t stay cold very long. Initially taking sips from it, I began pouring it over my head to survive the 90 minutes.

I survived, never left the room or skipped a posture, but it felt like my first class all over again.

I am in awe of everyone in that room who has spent the past two months training twice a day with workshops in between. They basically leave their life behind and come back as Bikram warriors. I went back to Bikram Detroit with a renewed respect for my teachers, the healing possibilities of the practice, and the man they call “The Boss.”